Ashes to Ashes Read online

  I waited patiently while he processed the information. I knew he’d have a million questions, not the least of which would be where I left my sanity. He was quite adorable when he was thinking, always scrunching his forehead and chewing his lip.

  There was a time, back in high school, that I had a huge crush on Jack. He’d always been adorable in a boy-next-door kind of way, but as the years passed, he became more of a brother figure to me. As adults, the very idea of a romantic link between us was vomit-inducing. Still, his face was cute, and his thoughtful face was more adorable. He continued to sit, processing the information for a few moments longer.

  “Cinderella’s nieces?” he asked.

  “Y-yes...”

  “And what, exactly, do you turn into?”

  “Wolves,” I declared, waiting for the million-dollar question, what the heck is wrong with you, but it never came.

  “Cool,” he said, then stood up and went to the kitchen to get food. I watched him raid our pantry and pull out a tub of peanut butter without a care in the world.

  “Wait, Jack, I don’t think you understand. I’m serious. It’s all true, not a practical joke.”

  “Sure, I got it. Makes sense,” Jack said around a mouthful of peanut butter.

  I hated when he did that, ate it right out of the tub because he always double-dipped. I loved him to pieces, but I didn’t want to eat drooly peanut butter. I gave him my best ‘don’t you dare’ glare, and he dropped the spoon in the sink instead of dipping again.

  “How pray tell, does it make sense?” Ely asked. It was the first thing anyone else had said since I began my conversation with Jack. I’d all but forgotten there were other people in the room.

  Jack wiped his peanut butter fingers on his pants and sat on the floor across from me again.

  “Back in elementary school there was this girl in my class, really pretty, but she was weird, like, really weird. She could eat a ton of food. No lie, she once ate an entire large pizza at lunch when we were seven-years-old.”

  “What does that have to do with any of this?” Cecily asked, about as perplexed as I was that he wasn’t running away like Brian did.

  “Well, one day I was walking home just before dark. I saw her walking toward the woods, and I was curious, so I followed her. I thought what I saw was a trick of the light or my imagination going nuts, but now I know the truth,” he said. “She was like you, a shifty wolf thing, a werewolf or whatever you call yourselves.”

  “What?” Ely jumped toward Jack, grabbing his arm and startling him. Jack shoved Ely back and smoothed out his ruffled shirt.

  “Geez dude, lay off the coffee or something,” Jack said, and I had to stifle my laugh. “I said she was like Cecily and Sierra. All this time I assumed it was in my head. Honestly, it’s been driving me crazy for years, but now I know it wasn’t me. It was her.”

  “What was her name?” Ely asked, still in Jack’s face.

  “Seriously, man, you’ve gotta back up. You’re spitting in my face.” Jack slid away from Ely, around to the safe side of me.

  “Ely, calm down. Why do you always have to be so... so... why do you have to be so Ely about everything? You’re as bad as Wil.” Brody sighed and pulled Ely away from poor Jack. “Do you remember her name, Jack?”

  Jack thought for a while, then like a light switch flipping, he shouted, “Jemma! That was it, Jemma... hmm, what was it?”

  “Jemma Samuels?” I asked, the only Jemma I remembered from high school, though she could very well have gone to another school.

  “Yes! That was her!” he shouted, very excited to be participating in the insanity. He was like a child the night before his birthday, excited and giddy—so very Jack.

  “You’re telling me Jemma Samuels is like us? A wolf?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I think so. I mean, it’s been a while but—”

  “She’s your cousin,” Heidi interrupted, verbalizing what I was already thinking. She glanced at Ely who was rubbing his temples with his fingers. “Looks like we’re making another stop before heading back home.”

  “It appears,” Felix replied, taking the lead. “Jack, pack a bag and meet us back here in one hour. I will plan the route, and the rest of you will—”

  “Um, what?” Jack asked. “I have finals in two days. I’m not going anywhere. Why do I need to go to... wait, where are you going?”

  “Goldene Stadt,” I said.

  “Gold what? Where in the world is that?” he asked, scratching his head.

  “Germany, middle of the Black Forest right above Schwartzwald. We’ll go there first to ensure your safety,” Heidi informed as if that information helped him place the village in any way. “It’s a lovely place, really,” she said as an afterthought.

  “Uh, yeah, I’m not traveling to some crazy place in Germany where Cinderella lives until after finals.”

  “Jack, please think about what this means. You could be in danger because you know us,” I reasoned.

  “Nope, I paid for this semester, and I’m not retaking it, Si,” he argued. “I highly doubt Cinderella will show up in her little pumpkin carriage to slaughter me in the middle of campus.”

  “Okay, probably not, but—”

  “No. Don’t you do it.” He covered his ears with his hands and closed his eyes, trying to block me out.

  “Jack,” I whined.

  “Sierra Monroe, do not do this to me,” he demanded, but he was powerless.

  “Jack, please?” I whined again, knowing he couldn’t turn me down when I begged.

  “Two days! Can’t it wait two days? What about Brian? Won’t he be in danger? And Dannie?”

  “Dannie knows nothing and Brian... well, he’s not a concern. He broke up with Cecily,” I said, finding the words tasted bitter on my tongue.

  “He what?” Jack asked, and I saw a disgusted look pass over Felix’s face. There was no time to waste calming Felix down again, so I shook my head.

  “Story for later. Ely, what do you think? Two days?” We did need to find Jemma, and I doubted very seriously she still lived in Philadelphia. A little time to search might be a good thing. Ely sighed for the hundredth time but relented.

  “Fine, we’ll wait until we find Jemma, and everyone can go together.” Ely stood from the sofa, his stomach growling. “Deja Vu, I tell you. It’s Calla’s drama all over again, only now I’m...” He stopped and glanced around. “Oh man, I’ve become Wil Grim.”

  Heidi laughed loudly.

  “Oh, you are. You’re becoming broodier by the moment,” she teased. “At least there are no boyfriends in the way.”

  “I was not in the way!” Brody yelled. “I’ll have you know I backed down the second I found out Wil was Calla’s husband!”

  “I know dear. I know.” She leaned over and pecked his cheek, a sweet love between the two of them.

  “Whatever, two days and we’re on a plane back home, understood?” Ely pointed his gaze at Jack who had become a thorn in his side in a matter of half an hour. Jack grinned, getting his way for the first time in a long time.

  “Jack made a good point, though. What about Dannie?” Cecily asked. I hadn’t given it much thought, but they were right. She could be in danger, too. “You can’t tell her, Si. She’ll lock us all away for sure.”

  “I know. I’ll think of something, but the four of you should go before she gets back,” I said, ushering them toward the door. I wasn’t sure I had enough brain space to consider just how I could convince Dannie she may be in danger. I started to devise several scenarios in my head, but none of them seemed like viable options. I’d have to think about it another time.

  Heidi hugged me, a strange thing for her to do given we’d only just become acquainted with one another, but then again, I had been spending a good chunk of time kissing Ely—equally strange in more ways than one. They all seemed relaxed, except for Felix who seemed prepared for battle every moment. If they were comfortable, then I saw no reason why I should be worried. However, I had a fee
ling I’d freak out once everything had a chance to sink in.

  “We’re at this hotel,” Brody said, handing me a card from a local inn. “If you need something or find anything suspicious, call us any time. Day or night, Sierra, I mean it. We’ll begin researching tonight, and hopefully, we’ll find Jemma soon.” With that, he took his wife’s hand and exited with Felix close behind, leaving Ely standing beside me.

  “I thought he was a royal guard. Why does he always leave you alone?” I asked.

  Ely chuckled. “I can take care of myself, but since you ask, I’m not quite sure. I think there used to be something between Heidi and Felix considering he guards her like a mama bear.”

  “That’s interesting gossip,” I said, finding it difficult not to smile in his presence.

  “It’s all the rage around the water cooler.”

  “Really?”

  “No, Sierra. We don’t have water coolers in the castle.” He gazed at the door, a bit lost in thought, then said, “Whatever it is, it’s not our problem. Besides, the Grimm girl loves that boneheaded boy so much, I’m not sure death could separate them.”

  “Mmm,” I replied, my brain too full of new information to process whatever love triangle was brewing amongst his friends.

  I noticed Cecily had disappeared into her bedroom, and Jack’s attention was zoned-in on a silly television show as he spooned peanut butter into his mouth again. I groaned at the sight but chose to let him have his peanut butter and television for as long as he could before I dragged him into a fairy tale with me. I was still surprised by how well Jack took everything, including running off to Germany with us. But then, he was always the more adventurous and carefree of us.

  “Sierra, are you okay?” Ely asked, watching me watch my best friend. “Are you two... I mean, is he... is there a boyfriend I should know about?”

  “No! Oh gosh, no. Gross,” I said. “Let’s talk out in the hall.”

  He stepped out and turned back to me, eyes questioning my every move. Whatever the pull was he had on me grew stronger with every minute. We must have been so deeply in love all those years ago, the feelings found some way to transcend time and continue to burn in the present. I found myself doing and saying things I would never consider with another man, outlandish things for Sierra Monroe. The only explanation for those things was a remarkable love story hanging on for dear life as the centuries flew by.

  I slipped my arms around Ely’s waist and lay my head on his chest. He stiffened momentarily, then let the moment happen. He draped his arms loosely around me and held me, happy to do so for as long as I would allow him.

  “Jack has been in my corner for a really, really long time. He was the only person who stuck by us through everything when Mom and Dad died, and he never let us go hungry. Sometimes he gave us his entire paycheck to make sure we were okay, which was a big deal for a nineteen-year-old kid with a sixteen-year-old sister to take care of. I just feel bad for disrupting his life like this.”

  “He doesn’t seem to mind. Are you sure he doesn’t have feelings for—”

  “I’m sure there are no feelings, Ely. He’s as close to a brother as Cecily, and I have. Also, I think he’s in shock or denial. Something that will eventually dissipate, and he’ll freak out like a normal person might. That’s how Jack works. Cecily, too, if I’m honest.”

  “Wonderful. Two people suddenly freaking out sounds like fantastic fun,” he said. “You understand this is for his safety, yes? I wouldn’t ask you to disrupt your friend’s life if it weren’t to protect it.”

  “I know and thank you for taking his safety into consideration without question. It means a lot to me.”

  “He’s your friend. I won’t have him used as bait to lure you into a trap, Sierra.” He pulled me a little tighter, and I knew he didn’t want to leave. He had to, or Dannie would know something strange was going on. She’d remember them from the diner and wonder why the crazy people I’d complained about were suddenly in our home. She remembered little details that I wouldn’t notice let alone remember, which made lying to her even more difficult.

  “You should go,” I said. “I’ll start tying up loose ends around here, and I’ll meet you in the morning to look for Jemma. I can’t believe our luck—or misfortune. I’m not exactly sure just yet. I’m not sure of anything, but maybe when we find her things won’t be so... so, I don’t know. It’ll probably keep being scary and crazy until I get my memory back. If I get it back.

  “Don’t count on it being so simple, darling. Wil and Jay had to convince Calla a dozen times, and each time was equally difficult. It’s not easy breaking this news, as you well know.”

  “A dozen times? That’s the second time you’ve said that. What do you mean?”

  He apparently did not want to discuss it but decided he’d better. “Yes, you see, every time they found us something went wrong, and Snow won. Every time we... we died, they had to start over again from nothing.”

  My lips parted, and I realized they were chapped. Too much talking in the cold weather and not enough hiding under my warm blankets pretending this was a nightmare I’d soon wake from. Not only did I not remember my first life, I had no recollection of those in between, but it made sense that I’d lived many times before. I never believed in reincarnation, just because I couldn’t bear the idea of my adoptive parents out there somewhere living without us.

  “How many times have I died? How often have you come for me?” I whispered, not sure I really wanted an answer.

  “I don’t know, maybe I never did? Or maybe I remembered you in the past, but I forgot every time I died? I can’t say, darling, nor can I guess how many lives you have lived. I can say this, be glad you have your sister in this life, or this would be a lot more difficult to bear.” He stroked my hair, a loving and gentle touch that felt vaguely familiar.

  “I wonder if I will ever remember?” I wanted to, I really, really wanted to remember if only to make the wolf curse make sense. But I knew it was more than that. I wanted to remember him.

  “I hope you do, but I should warn you... it’s...” He paused.

  “What? Intense?”

  He laughed sarcastically. “Intense yes, but also painful. It’s rather painful, Sierra. I won’t lie, it was the worst pain I’ve ever experienced. My siblings and I were unconscious for three days after we regained our memories, but Heidi has a few ideas she thinks will make the process less painful for you and your sister, and Jemma if we find her.”

  “Lovely. As if turning into a wolf and lighting things on fire isn’t enough.” I rolled my eyes with a little huff, and he laughed.

  “You used to do that all the time,” he said.

  I gazed into his eyes, wishing I could remember them from before. I marveled at the fact that in only a few short hours he had sucked me into his life. I was caught up in the story, one I was adamant was sheer lunacy only hours before. But wrapped in his comforting embrace, I believed every word that fell from his mouth no matter how fantastic it was.

  “Maybe tomorrow you can tell me all about it, but for now you need to go. If I keep standing here, I’ll never want you to leave,” I admitted.

  He smiled, the same full-of-himself smile he had in the diner and again in the forest. “You cannot know how happy that makes me.”

  He leaned down to kiss me, but I stopped him.

  “No one wants to call the fire department over a little kissing, Ely.”

  He dropped his head in disappointment but soon lifted his gaze again. He didn’t need to kiss me to show me how he felt. It was written all over his face, easily telling me what his heart felt without words. When he let me go again, I felt empty and alone. He stepped away, dropping my hands as he went. He took the stairs and reluctantly opened the front door of the building, looking back with disappointment.

  I didn’t know why, but when the door closed behind him, it felt wrong. I would see him in the morning, not long to wait, but something deep inside told me it was all wrong. The anxiety
only grew when I went back inside and saw Jack still happily enthralled with his television show. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t know why it felt so awful, but I knew it was a sign. Something was about to go horribly wrong.

  Chapter Six

  “Honey, I’m home!” Dannie yelled when she walked through the front door. It was lucky we’d shooed our visitors away when we did since she walked in with bags of groceries five minutes after they left. “Where is everyone?”

  “Here,” I called when I exited my bedroom and walked down the hall.

  Poor Jack followed me, tense and on the verge of popping a gasket. Once we were alone and reality sank in, he started over-analyzing every bit of his life. A thousand scenarios played in his mind, and Jack questioned everything he thought was real, including peanut butter. He believed the story, but at the same time, he couldn’t believe it was happening to us. He was still in the middle of processing when Dannie came home.

  Dannie smiled at me, then saw Jack mindlessly following me down the hall.

  “Oh, hey Jack. What’s up?” she asked as she draped her coat over a kitchen chair.

  “The ceiling! Ha!” he yelled a little too loudly.

  I closed my eyes and prayed he would chill out before he went and blurted our secret to Dannie, or the entire world for that matter. Dannie laughed and started to put groceries away.

  “Okay, who gave Jack sugar?” she asked. It was a reasonable assumption considering Jack was the reason we had to hide all sugary treats in the apartment. Standard Jack was a lot to take, but sugar high Jack was obnoxious beyond measure.

  “Sorry,” he mumbled, then went back to my room before he said something we would both regret. Cecily emerged from her bedroom with tear-stained, puffy eyes and red cheeks. Her reality had also come crashing down when the circus left, leaving her nothing but time to think about her failed relationship with a man I thought would one day become her husband.